What in the world are we doing here?

Sometimes I wonder whether moving to Belize was such a good idea after all, especially on days like today. I found out today that my dad and half-brother were in a serious car crash on Tuesday (head on collision, their Landrover a write-off)

They are alright, apart from the fact that my dad has broken his breast bone & that his heart rhythm is irregular, so he's in hospital whilst they monitor his heart's condition. I assume that he will be released in a few day, but still....It has completely shaken me. These things make you realize how incredibly far away we are from each other. To not be with someone you love when anything bad happens to them, is just horrible. We should all be there right now.

But also, I want to be there when nothing bad is going on. I just want to see my family more, on the good days and the bad. Lucas is growing up without any of his family around. It just doesn't feel right.

But then, life is so great here apart from that. I don't know....It's all so hard to get my head around.

I may go back to Holland sooner than planned though. We were thinking of going back to Europe in May. Anyway, I'll wait until my dad has spoken to the specialist tomorrow, so we have a better picture of how he is doing. Miriam is planning the same thing. She'll phone him tomorrow and then we will both decide whether or not to catch the next flight out.