Wednesday, March 08, 2006

(Not so) Super mum

I remember how, after having given birth to Lucas, I went through a phase of feeling like a useless mother. Maybe it was the hormones, maybe it was all the well meant, but bloody annoying “advise” other mums give to new mothers, maybe it was just inexperience….who knows.

Still, I didn’t expect to go through that phase again with my second one. But I was wrong. Last Saturday I cracked. I felt like such a failure. Covered in baby poo (don’t ask) & frazzled from hours of arguing with my 3-year-old, I was convinced that I was the most incapable mother on earth. Poor Karen happened to walk on me, just as I was breaking down & didn’t quite know how to react. I guess it shocked her, as I had coped pretty well up to that point. I hadn’t spent enough time with Lucas since the baby was born and now he had started to act up to get my attention. That was just too much to take for me.

So I decided that I wanted and needed help. Tella (of course) knew just the girl for the job, a preacher’s daughter called Deborah. Deborah jumped to the chance and showed up at 6.30 am the next morning! And what a blessing she’s been!

It’s so great to have an extra pair of hands around the house, especially as Aidan wants to be held for much of the day (he’s as cuddly as Lucas was). Deborah’s job is not particularly hard. She just has to hold the baby and help with a few household chores. Still, it makes the world of difference to me. I now have more time again for Lucas and his behavior changed almost immediately. He just needed more time with mum. He’s still a tat naughty…but nothing we can’t deal with.