How funny....I was just looking at some old stuff on my computer when I noticed all these little rhymes that I wrote a while back. I was thinking about writing children's stories, especially ones for picture books. But I don't know anyone who could do the illustrations. Anyone out there happen to know anyone? Let me give you some examples of some of the bits and pieces that I wrote (obviously, you need to use your imagination and imagine the pictures to go with it) :
Wrong-way-round world
In a wrong-way-round world:
Up would be down
Left would be right
and a square would be round
People would walk backwards
and grow smaller all the time
I'd bottle-feed my nanna
and what's yours would be mine
So let's just pretend
everything is wrong-way-round
Try to stand on your head
whilst your feet still touch the ground
Put your socks on your hands
and your trousers on your head
whistle whilst you're breathing in
point to blue and shout "That's red"
Brush your teeth before your dinner
shower whilst you're fully dressed
sit underneath your chair
point to east and say "That's west"
Eat your soup with a fork
and wear flip-flops in the snow
When I ask "How does a plant grow?"
Say "You reap, then grow, then sow"
Don't you think it's funny
to do things wrong-way-round?
Of all the funniest funny things it's the funniest thing I've found.
City head
Little Jimmy Brett
had a city on his head
It started as a village,
but grew and grew and grew
And though he tried to pull it off
it stuck to him like glue
The other children teased him
and called him City head
And it was really very tricky
to get comfortable in bed
One morning at the barber’s
he said, "Oh, could you please
rid me off this city?
Just the buildings, not the trees"
The barber tried his hardest
but his scissors were too small
He managed just to scrape the side of the city hall
So Jim went to a doctor
and asked for surgery
"Please take off as much you can,
city life just aint for me"
But the doctor said he couldn't
“Jimmy, you’re in perfect health”
The doc then even said
“I'd like a head like that myself”
Next up he tried the zoo
and offered them his head
Well, not the whole thing, of course
'cause then he would be dead
They were happy with his offer
and put him in a box
With the city sticking out on top
The kids came in for yuks
The children, how they loved it
to see a city, oh so small
But little Jimmy in his box
didn't like it much at all
That night at home, back in bed
he was sad as he'd ever been
Because the battle against this city
was one he couldn't win
But then the music started
Sweetest voices ever heard
On his head a giant party
what a rocking little world!
Oh yes, it was a grand fiesta!
And Jimmy felt so glad
To hear little people dancing
and laughing on his head
And so, our little Jimmy
did feel happy after all
Even when the city build a
brand new shopping mall.